Surely it is Not I, Rabbi?

Today we have Mark's account of the Last Supper and the betrayal by Judas.  When Jesus tells his twelve closest friends that one of them will betray him they are all quick to say, of course it won't be me!  Interestingly enough, in this account we know that Judas has already gone to the Sanhedrin and made a bargain for the life of Jesus in exchange for thirty pieces of silver.  So, how much sincerity is Judas showing when he utters the phrase "Surely it is not I. Rabbi?"


How often do we betray our faith in Christ and His teachings in very overt ways and yet we come to the Eucharist and present ourselves among those who are worthy to receive him, body, blood, soul and divinity?


One of the changes to the New Translation of the Roman Missal that I was really happy about was that we went back to the original wording of the prayer we say just before we proceed up to receive communion:

Lord, I am not worthy
that you should enter under my roof,
but only say the word
and my soul shall be healed.

When I am at my most vulnerable, when I am confronted with my sinfulness by the Confetior at the beginning of mass (in my thoughts in my deeds. in what I have done and in what I have failed to do. Through my fault, through my fault. through my most grievous fault)  My only response to the thought that I have betrayed my Lord is "Surely it is not I, Rabbi?"  When I know full  well that it is I that have made these errors in judgement and strayed from the path and taken my equivalent of thirty pieces of silver.  But I can stand before Christ present in the Blessed Sacrament I am about to receive and say the above words and know that even though I stumble and fall in my attempts to follow Him, he will accept me and heal me and make me stronger.  

And with the strength of the Eucharist within me, hopefully I can reject the offer of the thirty pieces of silver the next time it is extended.

Just for today, be honest with yourself about how faithful you are to following God's plan for your life.  Ask for his mercy and healing, and if you get a chance go to Mass or Confession, or both. 

PAX